Many of us have an idea of the kind of parent we want to be, the kind of family life we want to create and the kind of relationship we dream of having with our children.  Then, life happens.  Our little baby grows and starts walking, talking back and pulling things apart.

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Children do not come with instruction manuals.  Most of us have only our experience of being children to go on, when entering the realm of parenthood. We expect being a parent to come instinctively - around the realities of work and stress in increasingly busy lives.  Many of us find ourselves parenting in our spare time and feel we have no time to spare.  Some of us know what we don't want to do, but we do not know what to do instead.  And yet, most people believe that family and growing children into healthy, happy and productive adults is the most important work of all - and something that the future of our world depends on.

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Parenting is HARD work.  Children are on a different time table than we are as we try to stay afloat and succeed in life.  They constantly want us to slow down and be present.  We feel pulled and torn, impatient and inadequate.  We feel like they are too demanding and trying to manipulate us in one way or another.  Their needs seem to be unending.  We hear words coming out of our mouths we swore we would never say.  We feel flashes of rage we never expected to feel.  We yell so they can hear us.  We feel ashamed, embarrassed and alone.  We hope we are not damaging our children forever.    

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Parents receive so little support in our society.  We leave our sick children with babysitters because we are afraid to miss work.  Every parent has had an overtired child that does not want to leave the fun time they are having, right?  And yet, parents get dirty looks and disapproving glances at the park, the grocery store and restaurants, when they need understanding and support the most.      

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Parenting is deeply personal. Which makes it easy to feel attacked, judged and defensive.  Our triggers take us back to our own childhood and our relationship with our parents.  We feel our soft underbellies are laid bare and we feel so vulnerable.

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We turn to books for help - but there are so many with opposing ideas.  Who has time to read them all and decide what's right and what's not?  There's so much at stake... 

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